Unspoken words.

Yeah, I am here. My heart is beating and my blood is racing. I can feel my thoughts overpowering my unspoken words. I dread time when I am alone. When I think and think. People say I am crazy, so I let them think what they want. Part of my believes I am, but honestly isn't there is a little crazy in us all? When I fully succeed in finding happiness it always draws backward and leads to emptiness. I know there is something missing. Pretty much a part of me is missing. Such as a lung, a heart, a kidney, something. I dig through my thoughts, run through the streets, sing out my lungs, but nothing. I want to scream! My hands are trembling, my cheeks are pale, and my heart is pounding. I need you, I need you, I simply need you!

This Way Video by Michelle Branch - MySpace Video

This Way Video by Michelle Branch - MySpace Video

Blueberry Pancakes

Sitting, waiting, wishing for the day to draw nearer. The autumn leaves fall with brillant color and the river still carries its fish with a lighter flow of water. Three more seasons I await. Coffee and blueberry pancakes are comforting during these short days. I wake up everything morning with a rich smile and modivation to do well in my classes. Learning keeps me going and my mind fresh. Graduation awaits me as well in three seasons. My wedding also awaits near in these three seasons. White dress, white flats, diamond ring, and the most handsome groom. As those three seasons draw nearer my hair will grow much longer, my mind will become richer with knowledge, and my plan will be set. Patience is the key virtue. Tick tock tick tock.

Rainbow fish flow through my vains.

Certain tastes, smells, feelings, and places bring back certain memories. Good and bad. Sometimes its an emotion you can't describe. Sometimes i dive into the sea in my head and find that memory that makes it difficult to breathe in my sea. My favorite place to ponder is in the tree with the mattress on it with its canopy rose curtains. God has given me the grace not to forget but to heal. I am stiched back up and my blood is flowing smoothly. The fish are alive again and I can breathe.

You gave me reason to live.

You told me you would never be back, that this would be for the best. I ran far far away. I cut deeper. I cried longer. I ate less. Became weak. I am ashamed of it all. I broke hearts with my broken pieces. I made love to men I barely knew. It's like my heart of gold turned to dust in a matter of days. All my morals slipped through my finger tips. Then you came back. You wrote, " I am sorry for everything. I hope he treats you well". I was dumbfounded. Speechless more like. I then wrote you, called you, talked to you, met up with you. You swept me back into your arms and told me you needed me, that you love me, couldn't live without me. Till this day these memories float around my head like fish in the sea. Always there to stay. You give me reason to live. Thank you for coming back.